In Canada, the divorce rate is around 40% according to Statistics Canada. Of course, no one goes into a marriage expecting it to end in divorce, but unfortunately it is something common enough that may impact you one day.
One thing you can do to mitigate the possibility of divorce is being aware of common reasons why married couples break up. As many experienced couples will tell you, marriage is a lot of work. You need to be aware of the most common reasons why married couples divorce.
Here are the 9 most common reasons for divorce:
As one can probably guess, extramarital affairs are one of the most common reasons for divorce. Affairs outside of marriage are one of the most common reasons for divorce. While marriage is built on more than just intimacy, infidelity tends to lead to a marital breakdown eventually leading to divorce.
It can be incredibly disappointing and upsetting to be in a marriage where your partner is cheating. Often, people cheat in marriage due to anger and resentment, but also because of changes or differences in sexual desires or dwindling emotional intimacy. Usually people start affairs innocently leading to a slow rationalization of their behaviour which slowly gets worse over time.
Children is another common reason why couples divorce. Everyone has different opinions on how they want to raise children. Sometimes, this is not discussed before married people have children which can result in a lot of conflict when raising children. Children become such an integral part of your life that differences in child raising tactics can lead to divorce.
3. Lack of Communication
Married people become very close and share many aspects of their lives together. In order to function properly together, couples need to communicate. Without communication, married individuals tend to resent and become frustrated with their partners resulting in a world of problems.
In addition, when married couples lack communication, they tend to express themselves in unhealthy ways. This includes nasty comments to one another, arguments and not communicating at all due to anger. If these unhealthy communication tactics can’t be resolved as a result of poor communication, divorce is likely to happen.
4. Extra Weight
Unfortunately, when a spouse gains weight it can change the dynamic of the marriage. It may seem absurd and superficial, however, weight gain is a common reason for divorce.
One reason why weight gain results in divorce is because it can indicate a lack of self control in the spouse that gained weight which can be perceived as unattractive. Also, one spouse’s weight gain results in less attraction from the opposite spouse leading to lessened self-esteem. This cycle can perpetuate over time resulting in divorce.
When you’re married, sharing everything together is quite common. The memories and experiences are great to share together, but sharing money can result in lots of problems. Differences in spending habits, financial goals and income can lead to conflict in a marriage.
In today’s world, money influences everything including marriage. Couples sometimes can’t reconcile their varying views on how finances should be managed or can’t get over the fact that one spouse is more wealthy than the other ultimately ending in divorce.
6. Above and Beyond Expectations
Sometimes people go into a marriage with huge, unrealistic expectations. The expectations can be projected onto the pairing spouse which can lead to a lot of strain and anxiety. When the spouse doesn’t live up to these expectations, it can result in feelings of failure eventually leading to divorce.
7. Lack of Intimacy
A lack of intimacy between married couples is another popular reason for divorce. Generally speaking, intimacy issues often mean that there are issues with feeling connected. This can make spouses feel as though they’re living with a friend, room mate or stranger as opposed to their spouse.
Lack of intimacy doesn’t always mean sex, giving your spouse the cold shoulder at all times can lead to divorce. In a healthy marriage, couples need to find ways to show romance, kindness, generosity and appreciation in various ways to keep the passion alive.
It is extremely sad to think about, but emotional or physical abuse is a reality for some married couples. Abusive spouses aren’t necessarily bad people, often their behaviour blooms from deep emotional issues or their own personal trauma.
No matter what the reason for abuse is, no one should have to put up with that kind of behaviour in their marriage. Safety is a number one priority which is why abuse is another common reason for divorce.
9. No Equality
Since you are sharing a life with your spouse in marriage, sometimes one person takes on more responsibility than the other. This can lead to resentment and frustration within the partner that takes on more responsibility as they feel it is unfair to them.
In healthy marriages, each spouse needs to have their own challenges to work on. This helps couples live together in harmony as equals and respect each other.